A Hundred Thousand Angels
July 30, 2012Procrastinating, anyone?
August 9, 2012I rarely feel the need to comment on politics but sometimes life (in this case, two things I read while scrolling down my News Feed on Facebook) just makes me go ‘Huh? What century do we live in? Where is the Love?!’
As someone who has lived with physical challenges since birth, it particularly rattles me to see that in 2012, talented people are still being ‘turned away’ from something they would like to do because they use a wheelchair. I can understand people’s curiosity and therefore their questioning, but to decide how capable someone else is based on whether they can walk or not, seems completely upside down to me, particularly in the spiritual community where so many proclaim their belief in unconditional love! This example is just one of the reasons I have found myself battling with my own self-acceptance for many years.
As I write these words, I realize that this is the whole point, right? That if we are a reflection of eachother, and are still faced with so much discrimination, then it just shows how much we are all stuck in a very non-accepting place of ourselves. Of course, if I tried to explain that to the person who dismissed my friend or to the crowds who stood outside a U.S. restaurant yesterday in support of ‘traditional marriage’ (as opposed to same sex marriage) they would just roll their eyes. But – and I try to remember this as much as I can myself – how is it possible to be truly happy and peaceful at the same time as holding such strong judgement of other people? It isn’t. And what comes out of someone’s mouth is always about them, whereas how I react is up to me.
So here I go. Here I am judging the judgers. Here I am caught up in a prickly place because these kind of views really upset me. What can I do? I can look to myself. I can breathe and calm down. I can choose to speak my truth and yet not let other people’s fear and pain become the source of mine. I can decide to be kinder to myself and consciously choose peace. And with perfect timing, too. Because in the last week, since I had a very powerful healing session, and then felt the Angels wings around me on Saturday (see my last post) I have been experiencing myself in a whole new way! I am not going to pretend I’ve been jumping up and down with joy, or that everything has changed in seven days but given that this whole year has been hugely transformative for me and I’m constantly feeling ‘new’, I am beginning to see very real evidence that layers of my self judgement are being steadily and surprisingly unravelled: I have looked at myself in the mirror and been proud of what I have seen. I have glanced down at my legs whilst wearing a mini-dress and remarked that they looked ‘nice’. It may not seem like much but for someone who has spent decades fighting the body I chose, it could not be more significant or profound. I am quietly excited at what will happen next and at the far reaching implications that this deeper acceptance will begin to have on the rest of my life.
And so, while I cannot do much about those who still use colour, race, physical ability, sexual preference, (you name it), as reasons to separate us, I can choose to remember all the ways we are the same, how we are all doing the best we can with what we know and that, in truth, despite our best efforts to try and prove otherwise, there is absolutely NOTHING that keeps ANYONE from being divinely perfect, loved and loveable… just as they are… and that includes the person in the mirror.
May there be peace in the world and may it start with me!
With much love,
Anna xxx
4 Comments
I had to grin when I read that you were judging the judges. I often get caught up thinking about that too…but then I remember, I am human, I most certainly have opinions and judgements. I think everyone has opinions. We’d be kind of boring without them. But the difference I see in this judging you wrote about, and the other judging (like against same sex marriage etc), is that the former does not harm or hurt another, while the latter does. And all these differences that are used to divide people, or look down upon certain people are actually the spice of life…imagine if we all were exact clones of each other! I’m so glad there are people like you Anna who think these thoughts like the ones you expressed above. Judge away! I like your judgements! ((((((hugs)))))
Bless you, Swati. That’s right. We all do judge in some form because we are human but we can live and let live and embrace the fact that we are all unique. As you say, it would be boring if we weren’t. Love to you my sweet friend xxx
I’m not really too much a fan of the bible. But I agree with Jesus saying “The one who is without guilt throw the first stone”. We all judge and we always judge, it’s just us being humans. I even “judge” the weather when it rains LOL I even think in my head often when I see a fat lady “holy shit, you could loose some weight honey” and guess who is over-weight, too? Jep, that would be me. But I’m sort of glad when I see someone who weighs even more, coz then I feel less guilty for being fat myself. Of course this behaviour of mine sucks and I constantly remind myself to be more loving and less judging, but I’m no saint. That’s a fact. I bow my head in respect that those angels never judge but love EVERYONE no matter what they do. But I’m a fairy, so it can’t be helped 😉 Love ya!
Yes, we are human and we all have those moments. We can only do our best… Lots of love to you!